This week I spent a few hours wondering the cavernous exhibit hall at Ad-Tech San Francisco. After careful consideration, I present you with the 1st annual Blogation Ad-Tech Awards (sponsored by [insert name of AdSense advertiser to the right of this posting here]).
Best Ad-Tech Sponsorship:
The nominees are:
- The floor in the entrance area (NetBlue)
- The stairs (DoubleClick)
- The lounge (WebMasterRadio?)
- The computer terminals (don’t know)
- The badges (Datran)
- The bags (Casale?)
- The coffee breaks (don’t know)
- The air conditioning system (OK, I made that one up).
And the winner is (drum roll) . . . NetBlue. Hey, if you want people walking all over your brand, you deserve an award.
Best Promotional Schwag:
- A money clip with two dollars included (I wish I had walked by that booth a few dozen more times . . .) – Commission Soup
- Google gum – Google
- Red fortune cookies handed out by three Israeli women dresses as “8s” with a drunk jester who seemed to be hitting on me – 888.com
- “Opt-in” condoms from Arcade Rockstar
- Free massages (do you really want to listen to a product pitch while getting a massage?) – Don’t know, but I think there were several nominees.
And the winner is . . . 888.com. Next time, though, I would prefer it if the 8s hit on me rather than the jester.
Most Indistinguishable Category of Exhibitors:
- Online lead generation companies
- SEM agencies
- SEM technology companies
- Search engines
And the winner is . . . online lead generation companies! Did you know that there are at least ten companies that are “the leaders in CPA marketing” with “the highest payouts”?
Best Ad-Tech Indication That We are Indeed in an Internet Bubble Again:
- Journalists everywhere, mostly clueless;
- VCs and I-bankers everywhere, looking for the next Google;
- A gigantic exhibition hall with 7,000 attendees;
- Lavish parties with no clear signage indicating the sponsoring company.
And the winner is . . . VCs and I-bankers. I actually saw VCs (from big firms, no less) coming up to the Adteractive booth inquiring whether we needed funding.
Best Trade Show Booth Wear:
- The Miva girls (all blondes except for Kirsten, all wearing a cross between a Catholic school girl outfit and an Annie Lennox outfit);
- The Sprokets guy from TaguchiNow;
- The suave ‘Boys of Adteractive’ (well, the new shirts get a nod for ‘most-improved’ at any rate);
And the winner is . . . The Sprokets guy! Slicked back hair and a full red suit. Now we must Taguchi!
Best Name for a Company I Have Never Heard of:
- Booyah Broadcasting Group
And the winner is . . . Zanox! Because it sounds like a drug you take for heartburn.
So there it is. Congrats to NetBlue, 888.com, TaguchiNow, Zanox, VCs and lead generation companies. You can pick up your awards from the 888 jester . . . if you dare.